One of the most important skills in IELTS writing is the ability to paraphrase. In IELTS Writing Task 1 and Task 2 you are marked on your ability to paraphrase. Paraphrasing means changing the words so they have the same meaning.
This skill is important to practice because it goes towards your marks for vocabulary in the exam. Below is part of a paragraph from an IELTS problem solution essay about obesity.
Can you paraphrase this paragraph?
(Remember: you don’t need to paraphrase everything)
‘..Another problem that needs to be considered is that a lack of exercise contributes to obesity. As a result of leading a busy life and pressures at work, many people are just too tired to go to the gym or join a sports club. For example, after a hard day at work, many people prefer to just come home and sit in front of the TV and on weekends go out with friends. When people do have time off or a vacation they tend to relax and recover. ‘
Here are the words you can use, but you don’t need to use every word. Some of the words do not match well.
being overweight / laze / hectic / an additional / free time / holiday
take it easy / due to / issue / activity / fat / thought about / adds to
should be / tough / as opposed to / citizens / taken into consideration / recreation club
non stop / would rather / not enough / exhausted / take part in / responsibilities
Click below for answers and analysis. (make sure you try the exercise first before checking)
My Answer:
‘..An additional issue that should betaken into consideration is that a lack of exercise adds tobeing overweight. Due to leading a busy life and responsibilities at work, many people are just too exhausted to go to the gym or take part in a sports club. For example, after a hard day at work, many people would rather just come home and sit in front of the TV and on weekends go out with friends. When people do have free time or a holiday, they tend to take it easy and recover as opposed to going to a gym…..’
Analysis:
1. ‘Another problem‘ can be changed to ‘An additional issue‘ . The word “issue” is a good synonym for “problem” this is a common word that appears in IELTS essays. 2. ‘Needs to be’ we can use ‘should be‘, the meaning is quite similar. 3. Collocation: ‘taken into consideration‘ same meaning as ‘considered‘ 4. ‘Adds to‘ is a good synonym for ‘Contributes to’ 5. ‘Being overweight’ is better than saying ‘fat‘ as this has a very negative meaning. 6. The cohesive device ‘As a result of ‘ can be replaced with ‘Due to’ 7. ‘Pressures at work‘ can be replaced with the collocation ‘Responsibilities at work‘ it’s not an exact synonym but it’s a good match. 8. ‘Tired‘ can be changed to a stronger adjective ‘ Exhausted’ 9. ‘Join’ I used a phrasal verb ‘Take part in’ …this fits well in the sentence. 10. Grammar change: ‘Prefer‘ I changed to …’ Would rather‘ 11. ‘Time off’ = ‘Free time‘ 12. ‘Vacation‘ is American English and I changed it to ‘Holiday’ which is British English. 13. ‘Take it easy‘ is a collocation so I used this instead of ‘relax‘, it is a little informal for IELTS but it fits the sentence well. 14. ‘Rather than‘ can be changed to a more formal.. ‘As opposed to‘
The words that do not fit are recreation club, citizens, laze, hectic, non-stop, fat. These are either too informal or just do not match in meaning.